Today's our last day in town before we go to India. We've been really remiss about contacting people to say goodbye; unfortunately, both me and my husband have been needing to work at night, plus pack, plus manage an extremely active toddler, leaving us no time for anything else. Which sucks. But at least we managed to call our parents.
I'm getting really excited, though I'm trying really hard to keep an open mind about tomorrow's flights, especially the long one.
Right now I'm at work trying to wrap up and being completely unsuccessful. Our network connection is down, so no one can use anything but the Internet - no network folders, no e-mail, not even the phone in some cases. So, here I sit. Babbling on about how I'm leaving.
Anyway, I hope everyone has wonderful holidays and finds a chance to relax and enjoy. I'll see you on the other side of January!
Friday, December 21, 2007
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Abra cadabra.
I always wanted to have a post title that started that way. I have no idea why. And since I haven't had an abra cadabra moment for quite some time (Ta-dah!), I figured I'd just call my post that and be done with it.
The weekend is proceeding well. Yesterday morning was very busy - a trip to the dealership to fix my breaks, another trip to the DMV to get my tags renewed (this particular DMV, unfortunately, is only open the first and last Saturday of the month), a trip to Schnucks to get eggs then a trip to another DMV to finish renewing my plates. All of this was accomplished with Ragsy in tow, and he was remarkably good about it. He only started getting upset toward the payment portion of renewing my plates. So, not bad at all.
Today we've done next to nothing. My husband went Christmas shopping while Ragsy was napping and that was about it. During a late breakfast, I quizzed him about things I'll need to know before going to India. His comments were as follows:
1. In the North, Ragsy will be spoiled rotten. Most small children, little boys in particular, are doted upon, so much so that some mothers actually hand-feed them for several years and just smile at smaller discipline infractions as long as the kid isn't actually putting himself in mortal danger. I've witnessed it firsthand, but thought it might be an anomaly. Apparently it's not. My husband advised that we'll need to enforce standard limits where possible, but some common discipline (like taking things away if he keeps throwing them) is considered excessive. Hmmm... Not sure what to do about that.
2. In some places we're going to visit, during gatherings, the women are separated from the men. In the North where his family tends to have more servants, it won't be to cook or the clean - just to gossip. In the South, women are expected to do more and only eat after the men are done, so I might be cooking and cleaning, which is no big deal - I'm pretty used to that and feel like I should offer even if they say no.
3. I need to decide whether or not I want to cover my head when I meet my husband's grandmother. It'd be the respectful thing to do, so I think I'll take a scarf and decide when I get there. While it would be respectful, they might not expect it, so I'm not sure which I'll go with.
4. I'll be the stupid American. That's already happened to me in several family situations with my husband, so that won't be new. Outside of our country, not many people have a high regard for the American school system (in some cases, that's completely understandable). And since I'm female, that's strike two.
5. My husband will speak for me on many things rather than someone asking me directly and allowing me to speak for myself. In other words, like has happened many times already, my husband will let people know if I eat spicy food, have ever traveled outside the U.S., etc.
I don't have to walk two steps behind my husband or anything like that, but it seems like there are still subtle separations and disparities between the sexes. But I guess such disparities exist everywhere in different forms wherever you go.
Still, I'm glad I had a chance to ask him. I hope Ragsy doesn't come home spoiled too rotten. If he does, it'll be a rough couple of weeks while we re-acclimate. He's a well-behaved kid in general, so hopefully it won't be too much of a difference, though in kids, just a day or two can have a significant impact.
The weekend is proceeding well. Yesterday morning was very busy - a trip to the dealership to fix my breaks, another trip to the DMV to get my tags renewed (this particular DMV, unfortunately, is only open the first and last Saturday of the month), a trip to Schnucks to get eggs then a trip to another DMV to finish renewing my plates. All of this was accomplished with Ragsy in tow, and he was remarkably good about it. He only started getting upset toward the payment portion of renewing my plates. So, not bad at all.
Today we've done next to nothing. My husband went Christmas shopping while Ragsy was napping and that was about it. During a late breakfast, I quizzed him about things I'll need to know before going to India. His comments were as follows:
1. In the North, Ragsy will be spoiled rotten. Most small children, little boys in particular, are doted upon, so much so that some mothers actually hand-feed them for several years and just smile at smaller discipline infractions as long as the kid isn't actually putting himself in mortal danger. I've witnessed it firsthand, but thought it might be an anomaly. Apparently it's not. My husband advised that we'll need to enforce standard limits where possible, but some common discipline (like taking things away if he keeps throwing them) is considered excessive. Hmmm... Not sure what to do about that.
2. In some places we're going to visit, during gatherings, the women are separated from the men. In the North where his family tends to have more servants, it won't be to cook or the clean - just to gossip. In the South, women are expected to do more and only eat after the men are done, so I might be cooking and cleaning, which is no big deal - I'm pretty used to that and feel like I should offer even if they say no.
3. I need to decide whether or not I want to cover my head when I meet my husband's grandmother. It'd be the respectful thing to do, so I think I'll take a scarf and decide when I get there. While it would be respectful, they might not expect it, so I'm not sure which I'll go with.
4. I'll be the stupid American. That's already happened to me in several family situations with my husband, so that won't be new. Outside of our country, not many people have a high regard for the American school system (in some cases, that's completely understandable). And since I'm female, that's strike two.
5. My husband will speak for me on many things rather than someone asking me directly and allowing me to speak for myself. In other words, like has happened many times already, my husband will let people know if I eat spicy food, have ever traveled outside the U.S., etc.
I don't have to walk two steps behind my husband or anything like that, but it seems like there are still subtle separations and disparities between the sexes. But I guess such disparities exist everywhere in different forms wherever you go.
Still, I'm glad I had a chance to ask him. I hope Ragsy doesn't come home spoiled too rotten. If he does, it'll be a rough couple of weeks while we re-acclimate. He's a well-behaved kid in general, so hopefully it won't be too much of a difference, though in kids, just a day or two can have a significant impact.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Weekend madness.
The veil has almost lifted - the madness is nearing its end. Every weekend, I enter into a temporary state of insanity. Like my mom, I'm a meal planner. I pore over cookbooks, trying to figure out what's best to make. Unlike my mom, I don't spend a whole lot of time poring (I don't read cookbooks for fun) and I also try to get the most nutritional bang for my buck. Then, each weekend, I get the ingredients and go nuts so I don't have to during the week.
Because we're going to be seeing a lot of friends and neighbors this weekend, I've made dough for several dozen cookies - well, several dozen each of three different types anyway. Gingerbread, pecan sandies and something I made up that tastes like a chai spiced sugar cookie only was made with vanilla cake mix.
I've also made eggplant parmesan and will shortly be roasting a chicken. Then I'll be done. It's remarkable what you can do with a roasted chicken in just 15 minutes. Anyway, the madness is fading and I'm left with...a whole lot of cookie dough that still needs to be baked and an extremely messy kitchen. Blast. Now I have to clean the thing up.
Anyway, less than a week to go before we leave for India. I'm sad we won't be around for Christmas, but I'm looking forward to leaving town for a while and not having to clean all the time. I refuse to admit to my mother that I wish we were going at a different time because she cries every time she thinks about me going to India (she's laying on a HUGE guilt trip at every opportunity; come to think of it, so is work).
I don't want to a) make her cry more and b) have to comfort her while she cries. God, that sounds selfish. But coming from a family where tears are used as an extremely effective weapon and not necessarily to indicate pain, I'm a little immune. If my mom cries, I hate to admit it, but I feel more annoyance than anything else. I suppose that makes me a terrible daughter, but I can't change the way I feel anymore than she can get over the ingrained response of crying to gain attention. Ah, family.
Because we're going to be seeing a lot of friends and neighbors this weekend, I've made dough for several dozen cookies - well, several dozen each of three different types anyway. Gingerbread, pecan sandies and something I made up that tastes like a chai spiced sugar cookie only was made with vanilla cake mix.
I've also made eggplant parmesan and will shortly be roasting a chicken. Then I'll be done. It's remarkable what you can do with a roasted chicken in just 15 minutes. Anyway, the madness is fading and I'm left with...a whole lot of cookie dough that still needs to be baked and an extremely messy kitchen. Blast. Now I have to clean the thing up.
Anyway, less than a week to go before we leave for India. I'm sad we won't be around for Christmas, but I'm looking forward to leaving town for a while and not having to clean all the time. I refuse to admit to my mother that I wish we were going at a different time because she cries every time she thinks about me going to India (she's laying on a HUGE guilt trip at every opportunity; come to think of it, so is work).
I don't want to a) make her cry more and b) have to comfort her while she cries. God, that sounds selfish. But coming from a family where tears are used as an extremely effective weapon and not necessarily to indicate pain, I'm a little immune. If my mom cries, I hate to admit it, but I feel more annoyance than anything else. I suppose that makes me a terrible daughter, but I can't change the way I feel anymore than she can get over the ingrained response of crying to gain attention. Ah, family.
Friday, December 14, 2007
High as a kite.
I have had so much sugar and coffee today that I think my head will explode. I feel almost as doped up as I did when I took my glucose test when I was pregnant. Only with a lot less rage than I had then.
On a related note, I found out that there's a cupcake bar on Delmar near the Walgreens before 170. They have cupcakes with filling. I had a chocolate thunder cupcake with ganache filling. I don't like chocolate cake, but I like this. Apparently it had more sugar than I've had all month, though.
Anyway, today is good, sugar or no. Hopefully things won't go downhill, but for now, I'm enjoying my sugar high (before an abrupt crash scheduled for, oh, about 3:30) and will continue to do so for as long as possible.
On a related note, I found out that there's a cupcake bar on Delmar near the Walgreens before 170. They have cupcakes with filling. I had a chocolate thunder cupcake with ganache filling. I don't like chocolate cake, but I like this. Apparently it had more sugar than I've had all month, though.
Anyway, today is good, sugar or no. Hopefully things won't go downhill, but for now, I'm enjoying my sugar high (before an abrupt crash scheduled for, oh, about 3:30) and will continue to do so for as long as possible.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
The final countdown.
The final countdown to India has begun - we'll be leaving soon for quite some time, so I'll be on hiatus from before Christmas to the end of January. I keep saying it, but I can't wait to leave the country. My only concern is how Ragsy will fare on the flight. I think he'll do okay, but there's no way to find out except by doing it.
He's doing much, much much better than he was earlier. Thursday gave me the scare of a lifetime, second only to when he had RSV and couldn't breathe. When I went to pick him up at daycare, I initially couldn't wake him up. It was awful having to pull his tiny body off his mat and gently shake his chin to get him to respond. I never, ever want to feel that way again. But of course, I will. I still go into his room at night to listen to him breathe, even though he's finished his course of steroids to open his lungs and all the breathing treatments and is breathing comfortably in his sleep.
He should be fine to travel by the date we leave. Unfortunately, we need to make sure he gets a flu shot beforehand. We'll need to space that out to next week, since the steroid he was on lowers immune functions. I almost wish we could push this trip back by just another month. But it's gotta happen now or it probably won't happen for at least another year.
This trip, while much anticipated, seems to be coming at a worse and worse time, both with work and personally.
Anyway, not a whole lot to say. I should be working, but I've been in meetings all day with another one coming up in 10 minutes, so not enough time to actually do anything. My life the past week and a half has revolved around either me or Ragsy being sick. Work is starting to freak out because they're finally realizing that, yes, I'm leaving the country soon and, yes, my workload isn't going anywhere. Hence all the freaking meetings. Blech.
He's doing much, much much better than he was earlier. Thursday gave me the scare of a lifetime, second only to when he had RSV and couldn't breathe. When I went to pick him up at daycare, I initially couldn't wake him up. It was awful having to pull his tiny body off his mat and gently shake his chin to get him to respond. I never, ever want to feel that way again. But of course, I will. I still go into his room at night to listen to him breathe, even though he's finished his course of steroids to open his lungs and all the breathing treatments and is breathing comfortably in his sleep.
He should be fine to travel by the date we leave. Unfortunately, we need to make sure he gets a flu shot beforehand. We'll need to space that out to next week, since the steroid he was on lowers immune functions. I almost wish we could push this trip back by just another month. But it's gotta happen now or it probably won't happen for at least another year.
This trip, while much anticipated, seems to be coming at a worse and worse time, both with work and personally.
Anyway, not a whole lot to say. I should be working, but I've been in meetings all day with another one coming up in 10 minutes, so not enough time to actually do anything. My life the past week and a half has revolved around either me or Ragsy being sick. Work is starting to freak out because they're finally realizing that, yes, I'm leaving the country soon and, yes, my workload isn't going anywhere. Hence all the freaking meetings. Blech.
Saturday, December 8, 2007
Just like heaven.
This weekend was scary as hell. My son has a lung infection and is hopped up on all kinds of steroids to clear out his airways. Thursday was almost as bad as that morning we had to take him to the ER for RSV. In some ways it was worse. At least that morning, he was screaming bloody murder. Thursday he was slack-jawed and dead-eyed, stumbling around and unable to walk without falling down because his lungs were so blocked. I've never seen him like that and hope never to see it again. It came on so fast. He was completely healthy when I dropped him off at daycare. No fever, happily stuffing his face while waving me out the door after giving me a huge, sloppy kiss. But that all changed within three short hours. How did it happen so fast? What signs did I miss?
He's okay now. I wouldn't give my son up for the world, but at times like these, I'm really glad I have life insurance. I can't seem to stop myself going into his room while he's sleeping just to hear him breathe. That first night he started doing better, I sat in front of the TV for hours with him in my arms, just listening to him. It was the most beautiful sound I've ever, ever heard in my life - that slow, even, clear breathing. It was the closest to heaven I've been in a long time.
He's okay now. I wouldn't give my son up for the world, but at times like these, I'm really glad I have life insurance. I can't seem to stop myself going into his room while he's sleeping just to hear him breathe. That first night he started doing better, I sat in front of the TV for hours with him in my arms, just listening to him. It was the most beautiful sound I've ever, ever heard in my life - that slow, even, clear breathing. It was the closest to heaven I've been in a long time.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Two down, one to go.
I wound up going home yesterday. It was better for everyone involved. I just hope I haven't infected anyone here at work. Unfortunately, infecting family is more or less unavoidable. I called my husband at work to confirm who would be picking up Ragsy and he told me he was starting to feel nauseated. He said he had eaten a big lunch and hoped it might be that. I told him that he might as well go home now, but I don't think he will. Yuck. I hope he gets over it more quickly than I did.
Anyway, I'm still really lethargic, kind of crampy and generally a bit out of it. I'm just now able to eat small amounts of food other than white toast. I've moved up to chicken and a little pasta. On the upside, it's quick weight loss (which will probably return just as quickly).
Anyway, I'm still really lethargic, kind of crampy and generally a bit out of it. I'm just now able to eat small amounts of food other than white toast. I've moved up to chicken and a little pasta. On the upside, it's quick weight loss (which will probably return just as quickly).
Monday, December 3, 2007
How sick is sick enough?
I think my stomach is going to explode. Or I'm going to throw up. Or both. Unfortunately, I'm stupid enough to be at work right now, something I'm sure no one appreciates. I know I don't like it. Still, I sold my soul the moment I let work know that I needed to go to India for four weeks around 1/1. Since most plans implement on 1/1, it's a huge deal and I'm somewhat surprised they're not screaming more. I know they're not happy.
Which is why I'm here. I can take a sick day for my kid - he can't drive himself home after all. More importantly, being sick is probably scary to him. But I can't take a sick day for me unless I'm really, really sick. But I don't know how sick that is. I had a fever last night. I'm freezing my butt off right now, so I might still have one. My stomach, back and hips are cramping. I should probably leave right now, but I can't get people to stop talking to me long enough to reschedule anything.
I'm really looking forward to meeting my husband's family, but I wish to God I weren't taking off for so long.
Which is why I'm here. I can take a sick day for my kid - he can't drive himself home after all. More importantly, being sick is probably scary to him. But I can't take a sick day for me unless I'm really, really sick. But I don't know how sick that is. I had a fever last night. I'm freezing my butt off right now, so I might still have one. My stomach, back and hips are cramping. I should probably leave right now, but I can't get people to stop talking to me long enough to reschedule anything.
I'm really looking forward to meeting my husband's family, but I wish to God I weren't taking off for so long.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
It ain't product if you don't reorg.
I'm relatively certain my team is going to reorganize again. Given that they reorganized twice while I was on maternity leave and have reorganized another two times since July, another one would just be par for the course.
The reason I suspect this, you ask? Well, aside from the tightly-closed door meetings and various evolutions of our products, requiring more and more resources and specialization, we've all gotten a mandatory meeting invite for next week, along with a team building meeting for the following week and the week after that, a "social event" that also involves team building. So, yeah, something's afoot.
Of course, every time the group reorganizes, we all get mildly paranoid and/or annoyed. We inevitably worry about the future of the team (including our jobs or who we'll be reporting to next) and the products then we all get annoyed when we realize that nothing's going to change - we just got freaked out for nothing. Not that I want a good reason to freak out, but come on. Enough with the political BS. Oh, well. I guess that's part and parcel of working on a federally-funded program. More political BS than you could shake a stick at. Ick. I hate BS.
The reason I suspect this, you ask? Well, aside from the tightly-closed door meetings and various evolutions of our products, requiring more and more resources and specialization, we've all gotten a mandatory meeting invite for next week, along with a team building meeting for the following week and the week after that, a "social event" that also involves team building. So, yeah, something's afoot.
Of course, every time the group reorganizes, we all get mildly paranoid and/or annoyed. We inevitably worry about the future of the team (including our jobs or who we'll be reporting to next) and the products then we all get annoyed when we realize that nothing's going to change - we just got freaked out for nothing. Not that I want a good reason to freak out, but come on. Enough with the political BS. Oh, well. I guess that's part and parcel of working on a federally-funded program. More political BS than you could shake a stick at. Ick. I hate BS.
It's not light if you eat 10 of them.
I've become reasonably decent at making healthful foods or at least less bad versions of non-healthful foods. Unfortunately, I've made some chai shortbreads that I know are only 50 calories a shortbread and can't seem to stop eating them. I've probably had at least five. I want to lose six more pounds before I go to India, so I'll have to rein it in, otherwise, it'll never happen.
My husband and son are off Christmas shopping. It'll be interesting to see if they come home with anything. I feel a little bad since I practically kicked them out; however, it's nice to have some time to myself. I took care of Ragsy most of the day yesterday while we were meeting with our broker, then again when we went out to lunch and yet again when my husband conked out on the couch. Then it was my morning to get up with him this morning and my husband was only waking up as Ragsy was going down for his noon nap. I don't know many adults who could get away with sleeping until noon any day of the week unless they were deathly ill - either I'm a huge sucker or my husband is relatively lucky.
We look at sleep totally differently. Nighttime sleep is a necessity, but I like to get by with as little as possible during the week (when else am I supposed to get stuff done?) and eight hours tops on the weekends. Naps are a huge luxury, something I do only if I'm very, very sick or got less than three hours of sleep the night before and don't have to work. My husband, on the other hand, sees all sleep as something you need. So, his three-hour nap yesterday? Well, his theory is that he wouldn't have slept that long if he didn't need it. Same for sleeping until 12 p.m. this afternoon. My view is that if I have three hours with which to sleep in the first place or if I'm free until noon, there's no way I'm spending that time unconscious. All the more reason for me to get up as early as possible - I'd better be up and making the most of it because God only knows when I'll have that much uninterrupted time again to do, well, anything that doesn't involve cooking, cleaning, childcare, laundry or fitting in a quick workout.
Oh, well. Today I've spent a bit of my free time eating (damn cookies) and need to spend more of it writing and running. Oh, yeah. Then there's the cleaning I need to do, the laundry and I need to finish cooking for the week....
My husband and son are off Christmas shopping. It'll be interesting to see if they come home with anything. I feel a little bad since I practically kicked them out; however, it's nice to have some time to myself. I took care of Ragsy most of the day yesterday while we were meeting with our broker, then again when we went out to lunch and yet again when my husband conked out on the couch. Then it was my morning to get up with him this morning and my husband was only waking up as Ragsy was going down for his noon nap. I don't know many adults who could get away with sleeping until noon any day of the week unless they were deathly ill - either I'm a huge sucker or my husband is relatively lucky.
We look at sleep totally differently. Nighttime sleep is a necessity, but I like to get by with as little as possible during the week (when else am I supposed to get stuff done?) and eight hours tops on the weekends. Naps are a huge luxury, something I do only if I'm very, very sick or got less than three hours of sleep the night before and don't have to work. My husband, on the other hand, sees all sleep as something you need. So, his three-hour nap yesterday? Well, his theory is that he wouldn't have slept that long if he didn't need it. Same for sleeping until 12 p.m. this afternoon. My view is that if I have three hours with which to sleep in the first place or if I'm free until noon, there's no way I'm spending that time unconscious. All the more reason for me to get up as early as possible - I'd better be up and making the most of it because God only knows when I'll have that much uninterrupted time again to do, well, anything that doesn't involve cooking, cleaning, childcare, laundry or fitting in a quick workout.
Oh, well. Today I've spent a bit of my free time eating (damn cookies) and need to spend more of it writing and running. Oh, yeah. Then there's the cleaning I need to do, the laundry and I need to finish cooking for the week....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)