Fail

Remember how I was going to go running at 5:15 this morning? About that. Easier said than done when a 4 year old wakes you up to chat. Four times.

What's sad is how flipping freaked out I was the first time. When my daughter wears her hair down, she looks like the girl from The Ring if it's all in her face. It didn't help that she was hissing, "I need to potty," which sounds a hell of a lot like, "I need bodies," when you're dead asleep at 2 a.m.

So, I got her her bodies (or plopped her down on the toilet - can't remember which one because I was tired), put her to bed and went to sleep.

So she did what any rational person would do and woke me a half hour later to inform me that there were now tigers in her room. Darned tigers. They visit way too often. The tigers and the puppies in the wall seem to be our most frequent nocturnal visitors, at least in Evelyn's room. Rags has Death Gerbils. I like the tigers better. Less weird.

So I staggered back to her bedroom, demanded the tigers hie themselves off somewhere else and put her back to bed and staggered right back.  My husband was on my pillow so of course I had to roll him off. A few more grunts, a snort and all was peaceful again.

Another half hour goes by. At 3 a.m., she serenades me with, "Let It Go" from Frozen. After we watched the movie at least 6 or 7 times on the way to India and back and I was stupid enough to buy her the soundtrack, I kind of really absolutely loathe that song. Just a little. Mostly because it gets stuck in my head while I'm at work. Disney and Medicare don't exactly go together.  

3:30 a.m. and Evelyn shows up again, this time to ask how I'm doing. Which apparently startled my husband, who was lying close enough that when he jerked in surprise, he slammed his knee into my bottom, nearly sending me into the headboard. It's inappropriate to tell a four year old your ass hurts (in fact, it's inappropriate to say ass to a 4 year old one way or the other), so I didn't say that. I put her back to bed instead.

By the time my alarm went off at 5:15 a.m., I'm not sure I could've gotten out of bed even if the chick from The Ring, the tigers, puppies, Death Hamsters and Elsa had climbed in, too. So I reset it to 6 a.m. and slept in instead. Ta-dah!