All done.

I am now unemployed. Ta-dah!

Yestersday was hard. On the one hand, it was fun - like the last day of school. On the other hand, it was sad and absurd. I walked into the office and there was so much food, it looked like a buffet. There were signs and gifts on my desk and everyone who didn't have a meeting was waiting for me to get there. I had a meeting after breakfast #2 (I had eaten before, too), then I walked around in the other wings for an hour or so, saying goodbye to people I worked with before my exit interview.

During the interview, I was very candid. At this company, they have HR do the exit so if you have negative comments, you don't have to make them directly to management and feel as though you can't speak or that you'll be retaliated against, since they have so many people come back to the company after leaving. Who knew? Anyway, won't go into too much detail. So, after the interview, I walked around saying goodbye for another hour, then went to lunch, then more goodbyes when I came back.

Then I had another meeting, then more goodbyes. By now it was about 4 p.m. I turned in my computer, badge, parking permit, VPN and did some more goodbyes (I worked with a lot of different people within the organization), then it was time to go. Most of the people in the department wanted to walk me out to my car (fortunately not for security reasons). I was trying not to cry most of the time. It was really stupid, but it was hard to leave and very hard to be on the receiving end of that much positive emotion. It was more flattering than I can describe, since I was only there for just shy of three years. Everyone packed up my car for me and hugged me and I got in and off I went.

I'm exhausted, but better than last night. Someone who worked there warned me that coming out of Medicare product management is like coming out of a coma - you're confused, the light hurts your eyes and you almost wish you were back in the coma if only because it's what your body is used to. I can see that. I feel kind of naked now without my job. I've never determined my self worth by my job, but without one and without the same desperation to find another one immediately that I would have felt were I younger and less experienced, I feel lost. It's very disorienting. Ah, well. I'm sure I'll get over it. Now is the time for relaxing, resetting and figuring out what the heck it is I want to do. Relax first, think later.