Rajkot

I ran out of steam once more the last time I blogged (that happens when you don't sleep for a week thanks to a cranky, molar-getting toddler), but I want to get through India so I can complain and I'm almost there. So, here's Rajkot in a nutshell (or not so much as a nutshell - more like a biosphere):

After our flight to Amedebad was cancelled, we finally had to leave Delhi, go to Bombay, fly into Amedebad and then drive from there to Rajkot. So, our 9 a.m. flight and anticipated arrival in Rajkot via Amedebad at noon turned into a midnight arrival. I have to say, Ragsy was absolutely wonderful. Even though he was dragged around constantly, forced to sleep in airports, airplanes and cars and his movement was limited most of the day, he was still relatively sweet and relaxed.

When we finally got to Rajkot just after midnight, we had to spend about 20 minutes waiting outside before we could enter the house since they apparently had to wake everyone up for a ceremony before we could come in. So, I sat with Ragsy in the car until about 12:30 when we were greeted at the door by all the servants, my husband's aunt and uncle, his Nanima (who had picked us up at the airport), two dogs and the driver.

The ceremony involved a lot of yelling, turmeric paste, rice and garlands. And photos. Lots of photos. It was a welcome unlike any I had ever experienced.

We went in and, after a couple of hours, managed to get Ragsy back to sleep. Since he'd been dragged all over India and had slept in the car on the way to Rajkot (except when we stopped at a roadside restaurant for dinner during which he understandably screamed his head off since he was tired), he was pretty wired. We finally calmed him down enough to sleep around 2:30 and went to bed around 3.

The next day was wonderful because we did nothing. In fact, that was kind of our MO in Rajkot. The pace of life is so different than anywhere else. Probably because my husband's family can afford it and they don't live in a big metropolis like Bombay.

We took a few day trips, one to the family fort and then on the way back visited cousins at their palace. Then a few days later, we went to the family temple and had a ceremony and lunch and went home. We also had a party for my husband's birthday and shopped a lot. But, for the most part, the eight days we spent there all had a similar structure:

- Wake up - everyone's usually up by 9:30, though one of us usually got up with Ragsy at 7:30

- Putz around until Ragsy's nap at noon

- Sit down to lunch at 1

- Putz around again for about an hour

- Afternoon nap for the adults around 3 (my husband and I took turns with Ragsy because he'd be up by this time)

- Coffee or tea at 5 once everyone's up

- Visiting hours from about 6 - 8:30 (my husband's grandmother still has people come by for a cup of tea and to chat; people come by more or less every day to pay their respects and have tea - it's actually a really nice custom I'd like to adopt...if I could just get the house clean enough I'm not embarrassed to have people over)

- Ragsy to bed around 8:30

- Dinner at 9

- Hang out and chat for an hour to an hour and a half

- Bed around 11 or 11:30

It was a really nice rhythm to get into. Actually, it was nice to have a predictable schedule period, given our earlier taste of India and the hectic pace we'd had everwhere else.

The last three or four nights we spent either going to other people's houses or having people over for dinner. We just tossed Ragsy on someone's bed in the evening after he'd eaten and grab him on our way out the door. He's a lot more portable than I ever expected, even at this age. I don't know whether it was because he was forced to be or if he's just a lot more laid back than I thought. But why look a gift horse (or kid) in the mouth?

After a nearly idyllic time in Rajkot, we left for six days in Bombay and the last segment of our trip. By the end of our stay in Rajkot, I was really looking forward to getting back home and working once more.

Things I learned in Rajkot:

1. I like to work. Even if it's just cleaning.

2. Kids in my husband's family are coddled and catered to to a ridiculous degree. Yes, after about 5 years old, a lot is expected of them intellectually and the pressure can be absolutely immense (my husband's best friend's kid is 3 and speaks 4 languages!), but still, as long as they're smart and do well in their studies, kids can get away with murder and no one will say anything against them. Case in point: my husband used to throw all his toys off the terrace or out the window. The servants were required to go get them. And he'd do it again. And they'd get them again. And he'd do it again. The same happened a couple of times with Ragsy until I caught him in the act. Then there were no more toys until they stopped going off the terrace.

3. Kids aren't watched very much in my husband's family. I sometimes have helicopter-parent syndrome and probably interfere and oversee my son too much, although far less so here at home than in other people's houses. However, my son almost fell off a balcony without any railing that happened to overlook a concrete courtyard at one point. I was in the bedroom and my husband was washing his hands while someone told us not to worry - that they would watch Ragsy. But no one bothered to follow him outside when he wandered toward the balcony and he almost stepped off.

4. Handwashing is a way of life. Seriously, when you eat with your hands, you really need to wash them before and after every meal. Lots of people have wash basins in their dining rooms because of this. It's just easier.

5. The caste system and the concept of royalty is not dead in India.

6. When you visit, people give you money. Just because you're there. If you happen to have brought a kid with you, they give you more. And if you're having a birthday, they give you even more. Very, very weird. But I would walk into a room sometimes when guests were over to tea and someone would put hand me an envelope with money in it. Then they came for my husband's birthday and gave him more - for his birthday and for Ragsy.

Anyway, we were sad to leave Rajkot, especially my husband, who was getting somewhat homesick for India while there. Life is very, very different there - much slower in the smaller towns, more relaxed and a lot more family-oriented. I can see why he would be homesick.

And, on to Bombay.